The Power of Relationships

I believe in the power of relationships. I always have. That belief was reinforced when some profoundly important relationships changed the trajectory of my life. While I've had some great experiences and a phenomenal education, there have been times when I was lost, lonely, broken, and lacked direction. Those seasons in life are really hard, and it was healthy relationships that pulled me through. In the end, the most influential part of my life isn't about what I studied or where I've been, but rather I have been most influenced by the relationships in my life, past and present. To be truly known, and to truly know others, is one of life's greatest gifts.

My understanding of how much relationships can positively or negatively influence one's life ultimately drew me to education as my life's work. Learning is best realized in a relational context. Period. Said differently, kids learn better when they are learning with each other, and when they have relationships with adults based upon trust and deep care. This is a foundational building block of what we believe at SAS, and one of the differentiators of our school.

Maslow's hierarchy of needs shows us that humans require physical needs and safety needs to be met first, and psychological needs must be met second, before higher-order needs can be met. In a school context we know that when those basic needs are not adequately met, students cannot learn. Research shows that if a student doesn't find a productive way to build relationships with other students and adults in school, their learning is put at risk, and further, they are at risk of participating in other risky behaviors. Alternatively, when students feel safe and connected to individuals and activities in the life of the school, they are more likely to learn at high levels and experience personal success. Let me say it again. When our students are emotionally supported at school, they learn better.

When we published our strategic plan just over a year ago, we emphasized pastoral care as an essential component of the plan. We've been making great strides putting systems in place so that we can know and care for every single student on our campus. I am proud of the work that is underway and there is more to be done.

Extraordinary care has long been part of the fabric of our school, but we are more strategic than ever about dedicating our resources—including, and especially, time—to ensure student success in the social-emotional realm. I'm periodically asked about the trade-offs when we spend precious time building connections for kids. The relational investments we make are very purposeful—to create the conditions where students can learn most effectively. The investment in time for building relationships is actually an investment in learning.

Many SAS students are already developing the social-emotional skills to be resilient, successful adults who contribute positively to their sphere of influence. They do this through their classes, participation in extracurricular activities and service, interactions with their families, and relationships with teachers and peers. But for some students, classes and activities are not enough, so we are putting safety checks in place through advisory and homerooms, through the house system in middle school and high school, and through new investments in counseling support. Our professional learning communities also help our teachers work together so they collectively know our students well as learners, and together they support and extend their learning as individuals.

The greatest factor that determines life satisfaction is not wealth or academic success but emotional health as a child.

In terms of what we are putting in place, we have adopted evidence-based practices in every division. From Responsive Classroom in the elementary school to Core Social Emotional Learning Competencies (CASEL) in middle school, to a variety of vetted advisory resources in high school, we are creating dozens of new opportunities for building healthy and trusted relationships.

When we look at our desired student learning outcomes for our students, many of the skills required for students today extend far beyond traditional content knowledge that we have so beautifully delivered on. The skills students are developing not only enhance their social and emotional well-being, they also emphasize character and enhance skills in collaboration, communication, creativity, critical thinking, and cultural competence.

Richard Layard et al, What Predicts a Successful Life?

Over the past two years, I participated in a high school advisory with principal Dr. Darin Fahrney, culminating in the graduation of our seniors in May. Graduating those seniors was quite special for me. I was so proud of them after seeing them learn and grow over the past two years. I had heard the stories, I had seen the bad days and the good days, and I say with confidence that those students were known. I now share an advisory group of freshmen that we will work with until they graduate in four years. In the first days, I was nervous just like they were, but on that very first day, I was reminded of how incredible our kids are. Sometimes they are goofy and other days they are serious, but each one of our students comes with gifts and challenges that we will explore together over the next four years. I imagine seeing them cross the stage in 2021, and I know unequivocally that those will be some of the most meaningful student relationships I will have at SAS.

Regardless of who students are, introvert or extrovert, academic or artistic, a long-time resident or brand new to Singapore, we know that being known is critical to their success. We are wired to be in a relationship with one another, and we are healthiest when productive relationships are part of our life. At SAS we are committed to fostering these relationships, creating a foundation for students that will serve them the rest of their lives.

Our strategic goal, pastoral care, is designed to make sure every single student has a connection, that every student is known and cared for, and that every single student has the best opportunity for learning as a result of the trusting relationships they have inside SAS. When we do this well, we know that our students will not only learn more effectively, but they will be fully equipped to positively impact others after they leave SAS. And as professionals, we know that we will have not only served our students well, but in many cases we will have positively changed the trajectory of their life.

from Singapore American School http://ift.tt/2ldP0mE